Thursday, February 10, 2011

Love is Trust Revisited

So I have been reading through the book of Psalms lately in my new commentary that I got for Christmas, and I have found something very interesting. If you don't mind, I am a stats major, so let me lay out some important stats for you. I have read through the first 37 psalms so far. As I keep track, a form of the word trust shows itself in 22 of those 37 psalms. It appears 31 times total during that span. And after a little research, I found that it appears almost 70 times in the whole book. And I am only counting when the trust refers to trusting in the Lord, not in man. Those are some crazy stats! David, who penned most of the psalms, was a man who constantly trusted in God. He was called "A man after God's own heart". Hence, the name I used on this blog because I want to seek after God's heart too. But what does that mean? Well for one thing it means you are constantly after God's heart in a situation, after His will, after what He wants for you, looking for His guidance, searching for His heart toward those around you. That takes a lot of trust on Him to come through and to fulfill His promises. When you are after His heart, you begin to lose sight of yours as inevitably your heart becomes His. This is a HUGE characteristic of love. So much though that I am visiting the topic for a second time.

My last post on trust, is all still relevant. All those situations are still laid before me and at sometimes I do get worried (or excited: sometimes its hard to know which it is). But this post is going to focus a lot less on situations and more on the love and the relationship. Yesterday at Cru at UA, we had our Love and Relationship talk. It will be online
at this link soon. But during the question panel, an obvious truth stuck out to me. They almost all talked about trust in their relationships and marriages. Afterall, why be in a relationship with someone you can't trust? When you fall in love with a person, it's not a feeling. Love is a choice based essentially on the trust you two share. Obviously there is a lot more that goes into that, but why build on anything where the foundation does not exist? That's just stupid house planning. And I'll admit, I have built some stupid houses in my day.

I used to have a hard time trusting anyone, let alone a girl. I guess I had just never seen or experienced relationships or marriages to last very long. I never grew up seeing love between husband and wife, only mother to son. Somehow that enveloped in my mind this last 21 years of my life and I never trusted in any relationship, I even had a hard time trusting in God. As hard as I tried, I always went in with a subconscious mindset that it wouldn't last and that I didn't want to get hurt, instead of how I should have, which would have been going in with a mindset that says, I am going to put my heart into this relationship in expectation it will last a very very long time. I can remember the main relationship I've had in my life. That was a train wreck for me. There was no foundation ever built on my end, nor was there any ounce of expectation on my part. I hardly knew what it meant to love, to trust, to care, to share, to dream, to grow, etc. etc. I can tell you first hand that it doesn't work! When you go into a relationship with no trust, you began to breakdown on essential issues such as agape love between one another and communication together. You began to care more about what you want and think than what they want or think, and that, my friends, is a recipe for disaster. You desperately need trust initially and forever more as the rest of the house begins to be built upon it. I'll even emphasize INITIALLY. You can't build a house and then go back and make the foundation. I can imagine that wouldn't work out to well.

All that to say, there is a more over-arcing love that is important to us. That would be our relationship and marriage with our Savior, our God! You may say that you love God, but do you trust Him? If you don't trust Him, how can you say that you love Him? And you can say you trust Him and brush it off, but do you actually show that you trust Him in your life? Everything I just said, has the same affect here. You need that foundation! You can't love him selfishly! and you can't go into a relationship with Him expecting blessings and a good life, without a foundation of trust. When you initially start a relationship with God (or more realistically, He starts a relationship with You) trust is the first thing. He promises that He has your best interests at heart, that He will give you a future and hope, that He died for you, that He is preparing a place for you in heaven. It is our part in the relationship to accept His gifts as we trust in Him. And at the same time, reciprocating as much trust as you can to Him, showing Him that you care more about the path He has for you, then the path you set out for yourself. That you care more about giving and receiving love with Him, then you do with anyone else or thing. This is the most important relationship in our lives! And all to often, it seems we care more about what we have right in front of us, then what we have for the rest of eternity.

Relationships can be messy. You don't need to tell me that. But whats most important is that if you figure out you haven't been trusting in your relationship with a girl/guy or with God, you can knock the house over Extreme Home Makeover style, and lay that foundation and start over with the building based on the right premise. There is overwhelming forgiveness with Your relationship with God. He could build the whole house for you if He so desired (He was a carpenter after all), but He lets us help build with Him because a relationship is so important. Love is ultimately a choice, and He designed it that way.

So I will trust in Him.

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