Love is vast beyond all measure

Let me first begin by writing you the lyrics to one of my favorite raw worship songs. Let this truth flood over you.

How deep the father's love for us; How vast beyond all measure
that He should give His only son to make a wretch His treasure.
How great the pain of searing loss; The Father turns His face away
as wounds which mar the Chosen One bring many sons to glory.
Behold the man upon the cross; My sin upon His shoulders.
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers.
It was my sin that held Him there until it was accomplished.
His dying breath has brought me life. I know that it is finished.
I will not boast anything; No gifts, no power, no wisdom,
but I will boast in Jesus Christ; His death and resurrection.
Why should I gain from His reward, I cannot give an answer,
But this I know with all my heart: His wounds have paid my ransom.

Amazing, right? I don't know where you are when you read that or what's going in your life, but always know: the father's love for us is deep and vast beyond all measure.

About a week ago, A group of mine was going over a packet entitled "Shrinking the Cross". The basic message that I pulled away was that whenever you forget how much the Father loves you, whenever you let guilt overwhelm you, whenever your view of the Father becomes one of condemnation and punishment, you are severely shrinking the cross. We're all screwed up. We all have our constant mistakes looking at us in the face, but you know who doesn't? God, our Father, whose son took them from His presence and buried them deep away. For three days my sin and your sin caused such a searing loss between Father and Son BUT know this: It is finished, Jesus rose again! Our dad in heaven loves us SO much! Doesn't it just cause you to want to run after his arms? to love him as much as possible back?

And knowing that we are all flawed, let us also not judge and condemn others. Pour out the love you've been shown to all those around you! Encourage and build up those around you and provide them a community. Our fall retreat this weekend was all about community, and oh how important it truly is. We must not put up facades and walls to protect our dignity for in so doing you become even more lonely. So often do I do this and so often do i feel that repercussion. True community is honesty, vulnerability, love, grace, and as fall retreat pointed out: Desperation, Passion, Mission! so go out today and love on all those around you as you remember that God's love for you is:

VAST BEYOND ALL MEASURE!

God's bridge reaches to wherever you go!

Love is Sometimes Unnoticed

The time? 2:00 am. After 2 large pizzas and a rigorous session of Nintendo 64 with the boys, which included Mario Kart and Pokemon Stadium, we decided to cool off by heading outside into the refreshing 80 degree nighttime temperature. Nothing special, just four guys sitting in the front "lawn" talking away. But then, something we never would have expected happened (or maybe could have based on where we were), something that changed our whole night! I'm going to call her "untied vans" because that was her shoe of choice. But first, let me provide a little background info on where this all occurred. We like to call it "Frappe Snowland" also known as Charley's, Joey's, and soon my house. It is located in the sketchy old neighborhood south of 6th street near Campbell. If that means nothing to you, know this: It can be very creepy, ESPECIALLY at 2am. So here comes Untied Vans walking down the road BY HERSELF, talking on the phone. Seeming a bit odd at first, we kept an eye on her as she walked to the next intersection and stopped. She then flipped a 180 and came and walked by us again before stopping just in front of the neighbors house and then turning to ask us where we were. By now, the next 2 hours of our life were completely changed.

Untied Vans, as she tells us, is from Delaware and has a very distinct mix of a Southern and a Bostonian accent. She has been in Tucson one week, and as we came to know over and over again, works at the mall as a makeup sales person. Oh, and Untied Vans is completely drunk! She tells us, with distinct usage of the word "y'all" repeated over a hundred times, that she lives way off on the east side near Pantano but has just been kicked out of a party because of some girls boyfriend issues (and really just too much alcohol). She asked us how far it was, of which we replied, "about 10 miles". . .And then she informed us that she was going to walk there .....and walked off.

So we sit and ponder what just happened before we realized we couldn't let this girl make the last decision of her life if we didn't have to. So we followed her a couple blocks to another intersection and asked her if she would like a ride, of which she said "no", she has someone else coming to get her. So as she talked on the phone to various people (and informed us of who they were as she talked and a funny story about them) we talked to her and basically watched out for her. Apparently a "cowboy" friend she had just met was coming to get her at the intersection. She found a strange liking to Charley who she thought looked smart and "pettable". It was good conversation, but as she tried to prove that she wasn't drunk and could walk in a straight line better than any of us, she got angry and walked away.......again

Relentlessly not allowing this girl to be alone, we split up, two waiting at the intersection, and two following her two more blocks to the major intersection of Broadway and Campbell. She eventually called her sister who had agreed to come pick her up (which probably should have been the first thing to happen. Untied Vans then just walked across the major street while we attempted to protect her from cars and we ended the night talking in the Safeway parking lot until the sister arrived (and the guy who was supposed to pick her up at the intersection the first time). All alone now, we walked over to circle K, feeling accomplished that we had kept her alive, and then crashed back at Charley's (or the smart ones) house. The time was now past 4am.

All this to say, sometimes when you share love with others they will never remember a single ounce of it; Sometimes it will pass right under the radar. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't love. Don't just love for the recognition, or the favor, or to get it returned, or to fill a longing inside yourself. Love because they are more important than just another person; Love because they are our neighbor's no matter how we might view them; Love because they need God's love just as much as we do; Love because He first loved us!

He'll notice you! I guarantee it

Love is Indescribable!

It has been quite a battleground this week. For some bizarre reason I was getting really attacked this past week or so (or possibly up until the point I was told I was going to be men's team leader for Cru). My heart and mind have been getting beaten down and it was really wearing me out, and i assume my relationships were wearing as well. Over and over again in my mind are the feelings of inadequacy, of fear, of awkwardness, of being unloved. Some days, I would be alright, and others, I wouldn't know what to think as Satan continually lied to me. How could I possibly influence the other guys in my group? Who would ever listen to me? Why would anyone want to hang out with me?

I came to a point yesterday, where I was sick of it and so I went to worship God at the Friday night worship service. I got there early to do some pre-game reading done and to get ready to beat up this constant source of lies and confusion. When worship started, I focused in on giving my entire heart and mind to worshiping and talking with God. At various points during worship, I would flip open my bible and read something - and on one occasion I flipped to one of my favorite areas: God's promise to the captive Israelites during the Babylonian rule.

Jeremiah 29:11-13 NKJV
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, AND I WILL LISTEN TO YOU. And you will seek me AND FIND ME, when you search for Me, WITH ALL YOUR HEART.

Of all the times I had doubted, I knew God was listening to me. Worship continued going amazingly as I just focused on God. You ever have those instances where you are worshiping, and you can't do anything but look up? It almost seems like you are staring at the ceiling, but it's like you are looking past the ceiling, past the clouds, past the planets. Or where you feel so loved by the father that all you can do is wrap yourself up into a ball as he comforts you? You probably all have different experiences but you know the feeling that I am talking about. When I first came to write this, i brainstormed what I would title it. What was I feeling? of various ideas were: Love is comfort, Love is Joy, Love is life, Love is surprising. All of those are correct, but when it came down to it, I felt more than just joy or comfort. What I felt was indescribable.

The pastor kept interjecting worship with prayers that just struck me. He would pray for more love on those that needed it, and just for a fatherly love to guide and comfort. At one point, he even had people pray around people that needed a hug from God. To say the least, I think i was supposed to go that night.

So take heart all you are hurting, confused, or under attack, call upon and pray to God with all your heart and you will find Him. HE WILL LISTEN TO YOU. He will comfort you, provide joy for you, direct you, protect you, and ultimately, He will unconditionally love you.

Its Indescribable!

Love is Addicting

So what do i mean by that? ...love is addicting. There's a whole realm of possible meanings that could take on. You could be addicted to receiving love from others, You could be addicted to the love of giving to others, to the love in relationships (or the sense of not being alone), to the search of love, you could be addicted to the love of inanimate objects like your possessions or money or work, the list really does go on and on, and not all of the addictions are bad forms of love addictions. It's just getting rid of the bad addictions first that's the hard part. This is probably going to be one of the more open and hard posts that i have yet written, but bear with me. I don't feel like this is just a singular problem here that I am facing, but a universal one.

Lately, in a quite convicting manner, I have noticed that I leave way too many doors open to fuel my addiction for searching and receiving love from others. I have been single now for over a year, and until this last year, I had never realized how many things were wrong with me and how many things I have a hard time going without. I was in love with eventually finding someone that would love me for who i was. This last year, I left so many open doors that pretty much whenever someone who incredibly attracted me walked into my life, I tried to see if there was any possibility there. Over and Over again this cycle continued as various attractions became implausible and other ones presented themselves to me. And lately, God has really been grabbing a hold of me and shaking me awake and showing me there is something wrong with this perception. Its hard for me to not find love from others. I think that is a sinful subject a lot of people deal with. We have a hard time when others don't love us or don't even like us. We feel as if when someone disses us, or ignores us, or pushes us away, that our little center of the universe is falling apart, when through all of it, we should be the ones reaching out and loving others and leaving ourselves on the "planet" of Pluto (which i refuse to accept is not a planet!)

I can call what I have been the last year or more "single" but have i really been? When seeking love is still the central idol my life revolves around, am i really single? Just because there is not a significant other in someones life does not mean that they should inevitability call themselves single. From what I have come to believe lately, a single heart is one that is secure. One that is not constantly seeking to be un-single, to be loved, to be filled. Being single means to be completely wrapped up in Jesus, secure and growing in who you are, and loving others with no intention of needing them to love you back. This is so much easier to write then to live.

Here's my goal for myself, and if anyone reads this and wants to join me, feel welcome, but i refuse to leave the door that longs to be loved, to have someone special in my life, open. Whenever I want to feel loved, I am going to give it out instead. I am going to constantly live out everyday growing in the Word of God, enveloped in who He is. With girls, I am going to quit seeking out plausible attractions and just love the girls around me as the sisters they should be. And most of all, I am going to pray because when you talk to someone all the time, you begin to grow together in love. And God is definitely someone I would rather spend my time seeking after! I believe he is the source of the love i find myself so lost in and I will run after it.

I hope and pray that all of us, instead of being addicted to the love we get, get addicted to pouring it out on others; instead of being addicted to relationships, being addicted to your relationship with God; instead of being addicted to a feeling, being addicted to the word of God, which shows exactly what true love is.

Love is Crazy!!!!

Really, think about it.....love is crazy. The truest form of love, expressed all over in the Bible, the kind that loves your enemies even after persecution, the kind that loves others as yourself. According to what the world sees and lives, the love depicted in the bible is crazy and deprives ones self from moving forward or from being strong. I have been reading a lot about love in the Bible and from the book "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan lately. The more I learn about true love, the more i realize how different it actually is then what the world sees true love as.

-They see love as a feeling, a temporary and conditional feeling, whereas true love is a choice, not based on emotion, but on the unconditional love of Christ given to us.

-They see love as something to achieve or to get from someone, whereas true love seeks to give to others, at all times seeking one others being, higher then themselves.

-They see love as the bond between husband and wife, family, friends, whereas true love seeks out the poor, the needy, the ones who wrong us, the forgotten, the unknown.

If I were to be wronged and betrayed by someone, to the world's standard I should stand up for myself and fight back. But that is not at all what the Bible teaches. The bible says to love your enemies, to turn the other cheek, to forgive. The world would look upon me crazily if I didn't seek back revenge. They would call me weak. What I've come to understand and instill in my heart more and more, is that it doesn't matter what the world thinks. True love confuses the world.

Have you ever loved someone so much that you went crazy? not literally maybe, but figuratively. All you could think about was that person, all you wanted to do was talk to that person, everything you did was purposed to spend time with that person. That's crazy! And what if this person you loved so crazily betrayed you by making fun of you or ignoring you? Would this "love" continue, or would you begin to find feelings for someone else? Now imagine this...God is you in this analogy, and you are the one he is crazily in love with. You have ignored him, not given him the time of day, and you have betrayed him by constantly choosing sin over him. The world says seek revenge and move on. But God does not belong to this world. His love transcends all! After being betrayed and ignored, forgotten and denied, God did not give up, but sent his one and only son to die for us!!! After all we've done, God still has chosen you.

From the beginning of time, he knew you, he knew everything about you, he intricately crafted you inside your mother's womb, guided and disciplined you through your life, and set up a path so that you might hear his Word and be saved. That's crazy to me! How could God love me that much when all I do in a day is get in a groove and forget him most of the time, and then betray him with all my sins and shortcomings? And after i finally grasp that love (of which i seek to do everyday) how can that love not pour out from me? And not just to those who love me back, but to those that have betrayed me, like i have to the One who loves me more than anything i could imagine.

As I learn more about this true love, I realize, we can't be bogged down by what the world thinks love should look like. Our job is to love God, and to love others! Simply stated. I want my love to be so evidenced by the world, that they call me crazy and push me away. I want to love God so much that it makes others uncomfortable as a child is when his/her parents kiss. I yearn to share this love, to give, to serve. I yearn for a movement in all of our hearts to make this love so widespread that the world know longer knows what to do.

Love is Unconditional

I thought I would keep going on these early posts with characteristics of love that people know but never really grasp. Love being unconditional is one of those concepts. Just about everything on our planet is conditional. We live in a highly selfish society where love is only given to those that deserve it or have done something loving toward us first. When someone does do something loving toward us, we automatically assume its because we did something to deserve it. Its so hard for us to understand what unconditional actually means. And I know some of you out there are like, "I know what unconditional means, I'm not stupid", then you are just like me! So many times in my life, in so many different areas of Christianity have I felt like I knew the answers to everything, and to be completely honest, I do know a lot of the knowledge of what is in the Bible. The problem I continually face is instilling the knowledge I have into my heart; To not just know what it means to live your life a sacrifice for others, but to actually have it in my heart to go do it; To not just know that I don't have to fear because God is with me at all times, but to actually step out and trust in that promise; To not just know and understand what love is, but to actually love on others. Until you truly know and feel what unconditional means in your heart, you can have the definition, the language of origin, the pronunciation, you might even know how to use it in a sentence, but it will never really mean anything to you. I'm about to get real open in this posting so be prepared. A lot of times in my life I find myself feeling like a failure, sometimes due to the stupid situations i constantly find myself in, sometimes due to fear and not being able to step out. Whatever the instance is, lately I have been feeling like that. I'm constantly struggling with thoughts of why anyone would even want to merely like me or hang out with me. Just this last week in a car ride in the middle of the night, I found myself getting angry at myself because I couldn't even get over the fear of taking a risk and being honest. A lot of times like that, (it may sound silly) but then I automatically assume that I'm a failure, and because I am a failure, then they must not like me anymore, and it just goes down hill from there. It's severely dampened a lot of the relationships Ive had with people. And I don't just find myself in these situations with friends; I find myself doing this with God a lot too. I can never wrap my head around no matter what I do, God will always love me and want to keep spending time with me. I forget God's love; I forget that God fearfully and wonderfully created me. If I could take 10 minutes of your time to go check out a video of part of the "How Great is Our God" tour. It changes my perspective every time i watch it.

This Link will take you there

Doesn't that just blow your mind? the whole series of videos, if you ever get the chance to watch them, will rock your world. Sometimes in our lives, we forget about small details like that. We live what we see, and we forget what we don't. God's unconditional love is one of those things we have a hard time seeing. Getting into the word this morning, and listening to songs of God's love, and reading what God is doing in others life has all helped me start my day today. I've fallen away lately from getting into God's word as Ive been traveling, which is probably in part why I find myself feeling like a failure all the time. Every time I watch that video, I can't help but remember the love God has for me. Guys, He will never leave you! grasp that today. His love is unconditional. Don't just know it, Go and live it. No matter how many times you feel like a failure like I do, take heart, for God is still there lifting you back up. So take his hand, get back up, and continue to try and love Him as he loves you.

Love is not fearful

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18.

I have spent the last two weeks in the amazing, beautiful, picturesque city of Durango, Colorado. In this post, I hope to offer at least somewhat of a good snapshot of exactly how awesome my time was there. Fear was conquered for sure! ok, so here we go, try to keep up.

Day 1: The Drive I left at 5:15 in the morning out of Tucson (which to my surprise was the exact time of the sunrise) and then I continued to drive through Phoenix, Payson (beautiful city!), Navajo Nation, and finally entering the southern Rockies of Durango Colorado. On my arrival, I met something like 7 or 8 girls and then 3 guys. Luckily after North Dakota arrived, it balanced out to 8 girls and 7 guys. We played some epic games of pool pig, ninja, and other various games and discussions to get to know each other. Not much really happened the first day (other than the fact that i fell in love with Durango) so with that, we move onward.







Day 2: Souls, Falls, and Welts I woke up in the man loft of the lodge (my only night ever sleeping up there because it was too hot). It was the fear of vulnerability day. We opened the day with some awesome worship, and then got right into our soul to soul groups where we opened up and shared about our lives and our fears. It was just a great time talking and opening with one another. Later in the afternoon, we did some epic trust falls of a scale i had never encountered. Little did I know I was afraid of falling, but i learned one thing at the fall that i would carry with me the rest of my time there and for the rest of my life. Rip it off like a band aid. I walked up, without even showing a sign of being afraid and fell straight back. Later we busted out the paintball slingshots and played in the rocky slopes near the lodge. For my first time playing paintball, it was pretty sweet. I still have not had the pleasure of getting hit with a paintball, even during our civil war shootout (which is where we just stand in a line with no cover and just shoot at each other. That night, I slept in the rightful spot outside on the deck with my sleeping bag and a mattress. After that one night under the stars, and the beautiful sunrise to follow, I was hooked.









Day 3: Confrontation, Durango, and Rafting I woke up with the three other guys (Mike Rich and Dakota) who had decided to sleep outside as well, and was greeted by a beautiful sunrise! The first of many to come. Today was one of the first scary days i encountered. I was freaking out all morning. We had to go to various stores in Durango, and a) tell a cashier that Jesus loved them and b) confront the manager about the content and placement of the scandalous magazines by the checkout lines. I confronted Walmart about their magazine along side with Kadi, and we actually were able to have a pretty good talk with the assistant manager who did not like the content as well. I felt very accomplished because I was freaking out. This may be a surprise because I hid it so well, but believe me, just about everything I did, i was freaking out inside. After we went to one of the grocery stores, we saw a beagle get hit by a car and we tried taking it to the hospital but it died on the way there. That was hands down, the saddest part of the trip. We also had to give blood on this day, but not to use it as an excuse, I was having some heart panic attacks which was kind of scaring me and raising my blood pressure. So I was unable to partake in that task along with a lot of other people. We all met up after that and ate at Serious Texas Barbecue which is some pretty legit food. And then we all went rafting as a group. That was pretty darn sweet. I love me some rafting. Once again, we slept outside that night (Dakota decided to sleep out in the middle of the field). By the way, the temperature on most nights was in the low 30's.




Day 4: Repelling, Darkness, and Trust After eating breakfast, and having a wonderful talk on Identity and then the contrast between trust and fear, we split into two groups, one of which would go repelling first, and one that would go exploring caves first. My group was the repelling group. It probably took us 45 minutes just to all get our waist straps on right. We decided Kadi should go first because she was obviously the most afraid. And even though it took her forever to make it over that initial drop, she conquered that cliff like a champ. I then went next and just ripped it off like a band aid. After that, i stuck to taking pictures of everyone else going. 3 hours later, the other group arrived and we switched places and drove down to the cave. i had no idea what to think of this activity but afterward it was one of my favorite things. It was dark, and muddy, and there were a lot of holes and deep crevices. When we got to the back, we took some group pictures and then had a moment of pure darkness before heading back out. It was such a great day just to learn that no matter what we go through, God will always be there, no matter how dark and backed up we get, God will always be there, and when we choose to step out in faith for Gods Glory, God will always be there.





Day 5: Testimonies, Sharing, and crowns in heaven.
Talk about getting out of your comfort zone, today was the most uncomfortable day for me (it will also probably be the longest story). We each were assigned to various churches in Durango, Bayfield, and Ignacio, and we had to get up in front of the church to share our testimonies. so a little background for you, what i consider my home church is Applegate Christian Fellowship in southern Oregon. It is a church of around 5000 and there is an outdoor amphitheater as well as an indoor normal church area. One band in particular is the worship leader there, Seven Places, and many other lead singers and artists (such as kutless) come out of this church so its always filled modern hip music. Fast forward to my small church in Ignacio. Im sitting there in the pews of Ignacio baptist church and so far the average age of the people walking in in around 70 or 75. Finally a couple younger people enter and lower that average just a little. To start us off, we read out of a hymnal which was an experience for me. Oh and i forgot to mention, there were 23 people at church that day. So after the songs, i got up and gave my testimony and before i knew it, all was done. The pastor then went on to talk about pretty much the same topics as me, finding your identity in God and being a child of God. I thought that was pretty tizzight. So then the people that were at the small towns of Ignacio and Bayfield met at a church in Ignacio and we went sharing. Background on this town...Ignacio is a hard hit town of poverty, drugs, and alcohol. At only a population of a little over 1000, 50% is probably from the Southern Ute Indian tribe. We tried walking around and talking to people but there was hardly anyone outside. Me and my partner, who was just entering his freshmen year of high school; grown up all his life in Ignacio and Durango, went door to door, searching for people to talk to. After getting the door shut in out face once, being completely ignored once, and then getting turned down once, we finally found a guy who was entering his house from his car and got into a conversation. He said he was brought up in a christian home but isnt real proud of where he is right now. i shared a little of my testimony with him and asked if he wanted to develop a relationship with God so that he can feel proud of where he is right now. He said he didn't have time and left for work. So the first evangelizing experience was quite a time. That night we watched the Bema video which is a video of a sweet skit done at a church which encompasses the part of heaven where we are given crowns based on our work on earth, and us laying our crowns down at Jesus' feet. It was an amazing video!!! Definitely affected the way i look at things. Everyone should get a chance to see the video. Well that is all for day 5. A lot of story, but not very many pictures taken.


Day 6: SNOW DAY!!!!!
So this was the day when we were supposed to go on a solo camping trip, but overnight while most of us were sleeping outside, it began to snow. Mike and Rich and whoever else left that night, woke up in the middle of the night and moved inside, telling us, "guys, its snowing, you might want to come in" of which i replied "perfect" and covered myself in my sleeping bag. April, Lindsey, Kadi, Dakota, and I woke up that next morning covered in around 2 inches of snow. it was majestic. The low that night was in the low 20's and the high the next day didn't even reach 60. With that said, we ended up not having our solo that day. We, instead, had a free afternoon where me, Joel, Paul, and Dave hiked down to the waterfall near our lodge. We took a lot of pictures of the waterfall and the rapids. We even tried damming the flow of water (not very successfully). It was a beautiful area for sure. Not too much happened on this day, other than more games of pool pig, and an epic game of signs.

Day 7: All Alone ...
Today is the day, . . . the day we would spend 24 hours in the wilderness alone. The temperature had risen enough to enjoy the time with God. We spent all morning packing up and getting oriented with our equipment. I brought an extra pair of clothes, a sleeping bag, a lighter, a flashlight, two ropes, a plastic tarp to protect us from weather, and a bag of food. Nate walked me out to my awesome camp site near the marshes where the only way to get to it was to cross a log. I set up my camp site by getting the fire wood and preparing the fire pit. I made a bench, a pulley system to hoist my food 20 feet in the air, a sundial, a bathroom, and a devotional bench in the shade. It was sweet. Oh i forgot to mention i brought my guitar too and spent multiple occasions just worshiping. I read the entire book of second kings. I walked about about a half mile to the rapids on 3 occasions to read the bible while i was perched over the water on a cliff. When my sundial hit about 7pm the sun went behind the trees so i started my fire and ate. it wasnt long after it got dark that i huddled up in my sleeping bag, let the fire dwindle, and fell asleep under the stars for a peaceful night sleep. The solo would continue on the next day.






Day 8: Reunion and grueling hikes
The next morning, it took me 45 minutes and a thumb blister to start my fire because everything was damp. I then ate my food, worshiped and had some more devotionals. When my sun dial hit 11 o clock i packed up and headed back to the lodge. Found some sweet areas to take pictures such as the one to the left when i found a nice little rapid. After we got back to the lodge, we repacked, ate lunch, and headed straight back into the wilderness for our grueling leadership hike. We were split into 4 groups of 4 members and then leaders. My group only ended up with 3 students, Alyssa, Katie and I, but we had 3 leaders, Leah, Jesse, and LouAnn. The leaders were only their for safety and couldn't help out. One student had to lead the group however they thought necessary and one student had to be absolutely silent. We rotated positions every hour. They dropped us off really far away, showed us the mountain we were trying to get to, and gave us a elevation map. We had to cross a river on a log, then climb a grueling ravine that climbed 2000 or so ft in elevation, and then climb a really long trail to get up to the lake in the mountains. It took our team 4 hours and 30 minutes and we were the first ones to the lake. But another team who left after us, got there in 4 hours and 18 minutes. The other two teams were a story in themselves. One team had to use a rope to wade across the river and got there in 5 and a half hours. The other team ended up getting a ride to the lake. They still ended up at about 6 hours. We made camp at the beautiful lake but i didn't have my camera so you have to take my word for it. We ate, and then went to bed out of exhaustion.

Day 9: Hiking back and hangin' in Durango
After a BEAUTIFUL morning, a walk around the lake, devotionals, and breakfast, we packed up and hiked back downhill to the lodge. The rest of the day was pretty much free, so after taking a short nap, Dakota woke me up (and kadi because she fell asleep too) and the three of us plus Stephanie, April, Alyssa, Joel, and Katie drove down to durango to hit up the town. We went to Coldstone and then on Kadi's request went to Ralph Lauren where everything was extremely expensive. Other than that, not much happened. Another game of signs occurred on the way back (my sign was a wildcat, repping the school!!!). I got to watch veggie tales on the drive. That was basically the day. very chill.



Day 10: Evangelizing in Durango day 1
I do not have any pictures of the next two days, but the last day had a lot so i will be posting pictures from the last day. Anyway, Today was also one of those days where i woke up and just wanted to quit. I get so scared when I have to go share the gospel and its not because I don't want to share the love I have, or that I am scared of confronting others, or anything. I just don't ever know what to say and my spoken word is so hard and slow to formulate sometimes so i always think i am going to screw something up. Anyway, i was scared out of my socks. I was very happy when I got paired with April though. She is an amazingly kind and loving, and listens very well, so I knew it would be a good sharing experience. That calmed me a little. Me and April were dropped off at a park around 1:30 and were told to "meet at the rock at 4 o'clock." sorry it was just so catchy. We found two guys enjoying a summer lunch and April asked them if we could join them and if they wanted to take our picture survey. One of the guys was named Skyhawk, and was a native American in the process of moving. The other guy, forgot his name, was a very analytical science oriented guy. April and I took turns asking them questions on the Soularium of which SkyHawk would talk for 15 minutes each time. It was a great conversation that really provoked thought in both of them. Sometimes Skyhawk, who had a spiritual background, would go back and forth with the other guy who was agnostic. We went through the gospel with them through the 4 spiritual laws booklet and then finished the conversation just talking about animals and stuff. When we were done it was 3:18. We tried to start another conversation with another guy and got through the pictures with him but he didnt want to talk any further. After that 10 minute convo, me and April didnt really have any time left so we walked along the river and chit chatted about lives and i took some pictures on her phone. It turned out being a great day!

Day 11: day 2 in Durango
I was getting kind of sick on this day so it wasn't the best day for me at all. It was hard enough being out in the sun of durango sharing. For that day, I was paired with the awesome Stephanie! We were dropped off in the South East corner of downtown durango. Being in the park was so much easier for me. In downtown, it seemed like everyone had an agenda and were in very large groups. We ended up, well Stephanie ended up talking to someone who was working at a booth for a while. After that, I was just getting so overheated and overwhelmed. We walked down the entire downtown and then ended up sitting at a bench for a while in the shade and just talked about things that bothered me. Then one of the main leaders, Kyle came up, and no sooner did he arrive and ask us how we were doing, another pretty drunk guy came up and asked us a question of which Kyle jumped on and started a very long conversation that led into his spiritual background and the gospel. After being very overwhelmed and put on the spot, i shared my testimony with him and he got very serious all of a sudden because he felt he had abandoned his children by leaving for war. We gave him our contact info and told him to think about it. He kept telling me to reconnect with my dad, of which we told him to reconnect with his heavenly dad. That night, I started feeling very sick and feverish and weak and we had to give a 10 minute teaching on a snap shot of God. I had chosen true love while i was on my solo and had gotten the entire outline done and all the verses ready but had since not had time to finish it. After everyone finished theirs. I had to give mine without my notes and completely from memory from 4 days prior. It wasnt very good but i got most of my point across and only forgot one verse and point of my outline. after that i was feeling ready to pass out. I immediately went outside and went to bed.

Day 12: talks, jumps, trees, waterfalls, bonfires!
The last full day! We spent the entire morning going over our spiritual gifts and stuff like that. I found out mine were Teaching and Serving which i would have already thought. My 3rd was a little surprising. it said leadership. ...We had one on one time with our disciplers. Mine was the awesome Nate, who taught me a ton of ways to make my next year work with men's group. He taught me bible study ideas, and men's hangout times, and soularium tables on the mall, ways to get get guys interested and grow our mens group for cru. I learned so much. All the men in Cru better be getting prepared for an amazing time! We are going to step up to the plate and become the leaders we are supposed to be. After that, Dakota, April, Katie, and Lindsey went to the waterfall and took some sweet pictures. We took awesome pictures jumping off rocks, we freestyle climbed some aspen trees. We shot some clay pigeons. I hit the first 6 or 7 in a row before missing. The hidden talents i keep finding in myself. bizarre! And then to finish it off, we had a massive bon fire, where we burned the old deck and the old foos ball table and a bunch of other stuff. It was A-MAZE-ZA-ZING! We then slept outside for our last night :(






Day 13: Durango and the Drive home...
The last day, we had to say our good byes to the ones flying out. We all packed up and cleaned. Over the duration of the trip my tire had deflated, apparently it had a nail in it. So after I packed, I had to go to town and get it fixed which was only 12 bucks and i got 3 free sodas and water for the trip. Dakota, Kadi, Steph, and Lindsey, and I went to serious texas barbecue one last time, and then went shopping downtown to all the sweet stores. We each got color changing sea horses to remember our time. But then, sadly, everyone had to leave, so i went back to get my fixed tire remounted on my car and drive the 9 hour 15 minute drive back. I ended up taking an accidental detour but never panicked. i ended up just going through a very scenic northern part of navajo nation in arizona. (the roads were horrible!) I got back at a little after 11 at night. And that was my trip!!!!!!!!!


If you would like to see all the pictures, they are on my facebook here, here, and here!!!! i thoroughly hoped you enjoyed my story and pictures. It was such a great experience!!! Have a great day!